Why Old Souls Face So Much Darkness in This Life
Old souls bring deep light and wisdom into this world, and part of their initiation is facing darkness in order to realize that light. Lorin explores why so many old souls meet the shadow in others, from people feeling triggered to people turning against them, and why the hardest part is telling themselves that something is wrong with them. The episode looks at how this struggle teaches old souls to stop outsourcing their truth, why they wrestle with self-esteem until it rests on something that cannot be taken away, and what changes when they stop waiting for permission. Listeners come away with a reframe for their doubt and an invitation to carve their own path, create their own tribe and do the thing they see is missing.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Awakened Masculine Program
An 8-week immersive journey. For the man who is done repeating the same patterns in relationships, business, leadership, and life.
How Old Souls Find Their True Purpose
A 2.5-hour live online workshop with Lorin Krenn
Transcript
Do the thing that you see is missing.
Speaker A:Create your own path.
Speaker A:If you cannot find a tribe you don't belong to, create your own tribe.
Speaker A:If you cannot find a friendship group you don't belong to create your own friendship group.
Speaker A:Stop waiting for something to tell you you're good now you can do it.
Speaker A:You're seen.
Speaker A:Too many old souls are waiting in that they are insecure, they're disconnected from their true nature.
Speaker A:They, they're not aware of how powerful they actually are.
Speaker A:They're kind of sleepwalking for life with so much to offer to this world, but kind of waiting around.
Speaker A:Oh, hopefully one day I will be seen.
Speaker A:I want to see you thrive.
Speaker A:I want to see you walk your own path and trust yourself and carve your own path.
Speaker A:Stop waiting the fuck around.
Speaker A:Welcome to the Masculine and Feminine Dynamics podcast.
Speaker A:My name is Lorien Kren and I help people to get to the core of their deepest challenges in relationships, purpose and life.
Speaker A:I do this through my trademark coaching mythology, the Core method, which is also CPD accredited.
Speaker A:It allows you to reach the core of any challenge in the shortest amount of time possible.
Speaker A:Also, please note, masculine and Feminine Dynamics are not gender specific.
Speaker A:We all have masculine and feminine energies inside us.
Speaker A:If you haven't subscribed yet, subscribe now so you never miss an episode.
Speaker A:Why do old souls, who bring so much depth, so much light, so much wisdom into this world, why do all souls face so much darkness in this life?
Speaker A:That is the great question and that is the great paradox.
Speaker A:And so many old souls are asking themselves this question, either knowingly or unknowingly.
Speaker A:Why am I facing the shadow in so many people?
Speaker A:Why do people get triggered by me?
Speaker A:Or in extreme cases, why do people conspire against me?
Speaker A:Why do so many old souls have experience of people backstabbing them?
Speaker A:Why do so many old souls have experiences of seeing the ugliest side of the human shadow?
Speaker A:This is the great question, and in this episode I'm gonna answer it step by step.
Speaker A:So, number one, as an old soul, part of our initiation is that we learn to remember our true nature or realize our soul, realize our light through facing darkness.
Speaker A:Whether it's a dark night of the soul, which I talked about in a previous episode, or it's about loss, or it's about tragedy, or it's about some kind of our own shadow.
Speaker A:We've got our own shadow, of course, but very frequently, and if not for all old souls, the shadow in other people experiences where just by merely existing and by merely breathing and wanting only the Best for other people having genuine intentions.
Speaker A:People backstab you, people see you as a problem, and somehow you pose a threat to people.
Speaker A:Even though you're coming from your heart, you're coming from your truth, you're coming from a very pure place, from your soul.
Speaker A:So there is this duality on this path.
Speaker A:All souls, even though they bring the most light, I dare say they face the most darkness in order to realize that they are light.
Speaker A:And this is the unspoken part of the spiritual journey.
Speaker A:No one wants to speak about it.
Speaker A:And we talk about bliss and expansion and transformation, and all these things are real, all these things are powerful, all these things are true.
Speaker A:But at the same time, as an old soul, we came here to transmute darkness into wisdom.
Speaker A:We came here to transmute that darkness, to truly remember our true purpose as a soul, why we are here, what we're meant to serve the world with.
Speaker A:So facing this darkness and facing the ugly side of the human shadow in other people and all the lessons that come with it is part of the experience.
Speaker A:Now, this is the hardest part about this.
Speaker A:The hardest part is where we get really practical, is that we give it meaning about ourselves.
Speaker A:We say, something is wrong with me.
Speaker A:Something is wrong with me for attracting these people.
Speaker A:If I were at a truly high vibration, I would only attract good people.
Speaker A:As an old soul, eventually you find your tribe and part of your journey in this life or destiny.
Speaker A:I say, if I can say that is that you find your tribe, that you find your divine counterpart, all of that is true.
Speaker A:But at the same time, you also find the human shadow and all its different faces and all its different expressions.
Speaker A:So we start doubting ourselves as old souls.
Speaker A:And this happens all the time.
Speaker A:Paradoxically, old souls who carry the most light and wisdom, who are the most genuine, are the ones who doubt themselves the most.
Speaker A:They might even feel insecure.
Speaker A:They might even go through some form of spiritual depression or dark states, right?
Speaker A:This is because it's not easy to face the shadow in others.
Speaker A:It's not easy to face our own shadow.
Speaker A:But it creates a paradox, because when you're in the experience of doubting yourself at that level, you don't think, oh, wow, I've got so much light to bring to this world.
Speaker A:You're not aware of your true nature in that moment, and your own mind starts doubting your experience.
Speaker A:What if something is wrong with you?
Speaker A:What if it's your fault?
Speaker A:What if you are to blame?
Speaker A:And this, the hardest part, is the exact initiation that I believe from my deepest understanding and embodiment in this life is why is something we choose as souls?
Speaker A:Because it's ultimately this wrestling with this doubt, this wrestling with this not having evidence around us, no one telling us, oh, you're an old soul.
Speaker A:And this is what's going on, right?
Speaker A:Is part of the initiation.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Because it teaches you very quickly on your path to not outsource the truth or to not outsource your power instead, to find it in a deeper place inside your being.
Speaker A:So that's part of the initiation, is that as an old soul, you experience these challenges so you don't outsource your power and your light and your truth to other people.
Speaker A:For others to give you permission, for others to validate that, it's often the contrary.
Speaker A:You're not validated in your truth.
Speaker A:You're not seen in your depth, in your maturity, in your deep understanding of human nature, of the mystical.
Speaker A:And because of that, you are forced to find a deeper spiritual connection.
Speaker A:Because of that, you are forced to go deeper inside yourself.
Speaker A:It induces a dark night of the soul, so to speak.
Speaker A:While extremely painful and challenging, it's also the greatest lesson you can ever learn.
Speaker A:That we shouldn't be seeking that outside ourselves, but it already exists inside us.
Speaker A:Because the experience, the ability of you to validate your own truth and to trust, trust and surrender that despite what reflections of the shadow you see around you, that you can trust your truth, you can trust your light, you can trust your knowing.
Speaker A:That embodiment, that energy, that state of awareness, that ability to stay rooted in that, to really stay in trust with that, that might just be the greatest lesson one can ever learn.
Speaker A:Because while no one becomes fully invincible, and I talk about this in previous episodes, invincibility is a form of spiritual bypassing.
Speaker A:We are touched by life by merely awakening.
Speaker A:But I don't want to go astray here and stay with the topic.
Speaker A:While it's not about being perfectly unstoppable and invincible, that embodiment, that energy of being able to trust your path, trust your soul, despite of the different reflections of the shadow and no longer looking there and kind of, what if something is wrong with me?
Speaker A:What if they're right and doubt and blaming yourself, that is part of you realizing your soul, realizing your true nature.
Speaker A:And with that experience comes perhaps the greatest sense of power, the greatest sense of grounding, the greatest sense of realizing your light and how powerful you actually are.
Speaker A:Because you are no longer falling for the shadow and its many different faces.
Speaker A:You're no longer falling for the doubt and all its cunning ways.
Speaker A:Whether it's the shadow inside you or the shadow expressed in other people around you.
Speaker A:You see through that illusion.
Speaker A:You see that it's a smokescreen.
Speaker A:And you're aware of who you truly are at the deepest level.
Speaker A:And that is something that you can only learn through going through the hard experience of facing darkness.
Speaker A:From my understanding, as long as you're looking for something outside of you to validate your truth, to tell you you belong, you are welcome.
Speaker A:As long as you're doing that, you will continue to face lessons that push you to actually find that deeper truth inside yourself.
Speaker A:The moment you start trusting that inside you, the moment you start leaning on that inside you, and you surrender to that, despite what is happening around you, that is the moment where you start to begin to draw the right people, your tribe, into your life and you enter a different stage of evolution in your journey as an old soul.
Speaker A:So also another way to describe this, when you move from what is wrong with me to other people getting trouble, triggered by my energy might just be proof of my light, of my power.
Speaker A:And I don't mean this in egoic way or in an arrogant way.
Speaker A:Oh, they're triggered.
Speaker A:It's because I'm so powerful.
Speaker A:Of course this could be misconstrued like anything could be really by the spiritual ego.
Speaker A:But what I mean by that is other people conspiring against you, other people turning against you.
Speaker A:Even though you live with integrity and genuinity, that's proof of your power.
Speaker A:That's proof of others seeing you as so important that you pose a threat to them.
Speaker A:Them spending all this time, they wouldn't do this.
Speaker A:The shadow in others wouldn't spend all this time conspiring against you or trying to put you down or trying to change the perception or whatever backstab you if they wouldn't feel that you have something that they cannot have.
Speaker A:It is proof of your power and not proof that something is wrong with you.
Speaker A:Once you understand that, that reframe changes your experience and changes how you relate to that hardship.
Speaker A:Now, two other things to really go even deeper and even more practical.
Speaker A:All souls struggle with self esteem.
Speaker A:And a lot of people don't understand why.
Speaker A:I mean, like why?
Speaker A:Because as an old soul, you have so much wisdom, emotional maturity.
Speaker A:What?
Speaker A:Why would old souls struggle with self esteem?
Speaker A:Because there are two forms of self esteem.
Speaker A:There is ignorance is bliss, superficial self esteem, or you are connected to something greater than yourself.
Speaker A:So I know this is kind of intense or brutal and not many people share that kind of viewpoint, but this is how I Understand it and I will never sugarcoat and always share with you my highest truth or what is true for me.
Speaker A:So what many people describe as kind of self esteem, esteem or confidence is really a very superficial construct they're describing.
Speaker A:It's kind of ignorance is bliss, there's a cockiness, there is a leaning on things that are not permanent in their life.
Speaker A:And as an old soul, you often go through these experiences of self doubt and even seemingly insecurity because all of that is pushing you to source your confidence and to source your self esteem from something greater than yourself, rather than holding on to superficial things like a job, a position or how much money you earn.
Speaker A:For old souls, it's very difficult to feel powerful in that, so to speak.
Speaker A:It's harder for them to lose themselves in that because these things are not permanent.
Speaker A:And even if they were to be permanent, they are not the thing you want to lean on.
Speaker A:You don't want to lean on how much money you're making.
Speaker A:There might be more coming, there might be less coming, who knows?
Speaker A:There are ups and downs in life.
Speaker A:Leaning on that is leaning on suffering because, and I don't mean this in a pessimistic way, but what I mean is we want to lean and trust and build our self esteem for something deeper.
Speaker A:Not through I've got this job, I've got this position, I'm earning this amount of money, I'm living my purpose, but something even deeper, something that cannot be taken away from you.
Speaker A:This is where it gets a little bit abstract.
Speaker A:But all souls struggle to kind of find their roots and find their self esteem in things that can be taken away from them.
Speaker A:And there is a reason for that.
Speaker A:It's divine intelligence.
Speaker A:They're not able to find the roots there because you can't really put your roots there.
Speaker A:It's superficial, it's a construct.
Speaker A:Many people might seem very, very secure, but if that thing were taken from them, actually underneath would be unworthiness or deep insecurity.
Speaker A:Of course we all experience loss and it would impact everyone, right?
Speaker A:A challenge or loss of any sort.
Speaker A:But what I'm trying to say is as an old soul, you're guided on the journey to not depend on those things, but instead to source your self esteem or your confidence or whatever self worth, worth whatever language or however we want to call it, from something deeper.
Speaker A:And what is that deeper thing?
Speaker A:Your soul, your spiritual connection, your higher self, God, the great Mother, whatever you want to call it and whatever you connect with at the deepest level.
Speaker A:But that's where all Souls source their true self esteem because it comes from a deeper place.
Speaker A:It comes from a place that has true roots.
Speaker A:It comes from a place that is beyond this life, that is existing, existed before you came to this life, that will exist after this life.
Speaker A:And it's something that cannot be taken away from you.
Speaker A:It's part of your deepest essence.
Speaker A:So all souls struggle with insecurity only to the degree of trying to source it from constructs that are superficial and not permanent.
Speaker A:But once they connect with their deeper soul, or spirit or Great Mother or God or the divine, they transform that insecurity.
Speaker A:And they don't stay insecure.
Speaker A:They actually become much more powerful, but in a humble, not in an arrogant, in a very, very spiritually grounded way.
Speaker A:Now here's another really important point.
Speaker A:Many old souls struggle or face a lot of darkness as long as they're waiting for others to give them permission.
Speaker A:As long as they're waiting to be invited to the table, invited to the community, invited to a specific place where finally they are seen.
Speaker A:And finally you feel that you belong as an old soul.
Speaker A:Usually what happens.
Speaker A:Same with the insecurity.
Speaker A:You don't belong anywhere.
Speaker A:It's because you are meant to carve your own path as an old soul.
Speaker A:You're often a leader.
Speaker A:You're often the one who's meant to take the first step.
Speaker A:The mind says, I don't belong anywhere.
Speaker A:No one accepts me, no one sees me.
Speaker A:But your soul says, I don't give a fuck about that because I'm meant to create and carve my own own path, my own tribe, my own community, my own audience.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:I used to try to belong to certain spiritual traditions or communities.
Speaker A:And there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker A:That's super powerful.
Speaker A:But I realized on my journey that I kind of had to create my own path.
Speaker A:And that doesn't mean you have to do the same that I do.
Speaker A:It's not about what, what you do.
Speaker A:It takes infinite shapes and forms.
Speaker A:But one thing is certain, we all have to find our own path.
Speaker A:Hence why so much of the guidance and so many of the teachings I offer.
Speaker A:For me, it's always important to help people drop deeper into their own authentic truth and never impose my truth upon them.
Speaker A:Because I understand the significance of and importance of, yes, learning and being inspired by others, but using that inspiration to go deeper into yourself and deeper on your path.
Speaker A:That's what I see is the true spiritual journey.
Speaker A:And learning to trust your soul and learning from the wisdom of your soul is actually about.
Speaker A:So stop waiting.
Speaker A:The fuck around and create your own path.
Speaker A:If you cannot find a tribe, you don't belong to, create your own tribe.
Speaker A:If you cannot find a friendship group, you don't belong to create your own friendship group.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:Stop waiting for something to tell you you're good now you can do it.
Speaker A:You're seen too many old souls are waiting in that they are insecure, they're disconnected from their true nature.
Speaker A:They're not aware of how powerful they actually are.
Speaker A:They're kind of sleep walking for life with so much to offer to this world, but kind of waiting around.
Speaker A:Oh, hopefully one day I will be seen, which is taking the position of a victim.
Speaker A:I understand how hard it is.
Speaker A:I'm not downplaying any of this.
Speaker A:But I'm having to speak in a fierce way because I want to see you thrive.
Speaker A:I want to see you walk your own path and trust yourself and carve your own path.
Speaker A:So do the thing that you see is missing.
Speaker A:Old soul are the missing piece to something.
Speaker A:Instead of trying to fit in into a puzzle that's already full and already complete and that already has run its course, you see?
Speaker A:So stop waiting around and now bringing this all to a conclusion.
Speaker A:You can see in all of this that the old soul is not depressed or insecure or lost.
Speaker A:The old soul is only ever going through certain challenges until they learn the lesson of that challenge.
Speaker A:And then they transform all that darkness and all that pain, they transmute it into light.
Speaker A:They transmute it into the polar opposite.
Speaker A:So many old souls might doubt themselves deeply, but then as they start to transmute that doubt, they start to trust themselves deeply.
Speaker A:So the degree of how much they doubted themselves now becomes the same in intensity and degree of how much they trust themselves and surrender to a greater calling and surrender to spirit, to a greater power, to their higher power.
Speaker A:All of this is being transmuted.
Speaker A:So what I want you to hear as an old soul, if you're struggling, if you're going through a darkness of the soul, if you're facing darkness, you must understand that the deeper you go on this path and as you learn your lessons, the less, less you are going to be in this insecurity, in this pain, in this doubting, you will actually experience the polar opposite.
Speaker A:And in these experiences were never complete in this journey from my understanding and perspective.
Speaker A:But the deeper you go, the kind of, the further and the more you transmute darkness, the more you step into your own light, the more the easier in a way it becomes.
Speaker A:It doesn't mean you never face challenges anymore, but it means you relate to these challenges in a completely different, different way.
Speaker A:And even though people's shadow might conspire against you, you have a state of embodiment where you trust yourself at a very, very deep level.
Speaker A:You trust your leadership.
Speaker A:There's something really powerful that Jesus said.
Speaker A:I'm paraphrasing here, but one interpretation of something he said was if you trust without seeing evidence of it, or without seeing, then you will go very, very far in this life.
Speaker A:I'm paraphrasing here, and perhaps this is my own interpretation as well.
Speaker A:So this is not exactly what he said, obviously, but what a powerful statement.
Speaker A:What a deep and profound statement.
Speaker A:Is that not the path of the old soul?
Speaker A:To trust without the evidence, to trust your truth and your ability to lead and create your tribe and create the friendship group and carve your own path, however that may look like, is that not the path?
Speaker A:All the doubt, all the insecurity, all the tension, all the wrestling with that, all the face in the darkness, it's all part of that initiation for you to trust without seeing.
Speaker A:Yet remember, as an old soul, you're meant to bring something that is missing in the world, not try to fit into something that old already exists.
Speaker A:So remember, all of this is really intense, but you were meant to transmute it.
Speaker A:And as intense as it might be, the polar opposite experience becomes available to you as you learn the lesson and as you go deeper.
Speaker A:Thank you for watching or listening to this episode.
Speaker A:It's a true honor to be of service to on your path.
Speaker A:If you haven't subscribed yet, subscribe now so you never miss an episode.
Speaker A:Thank you.
