How to Recognize an Awakened Man or Woman
It’s not always easy to recognise genuine awakening in our partners. We can mistake spiritual talk for true embodiment, or confuse peak experiences with integrated wisdom. This creates painful cycles of disappointment in our relationships.
But awakened beings share core qualities regardless of gender: unwavering integrity, grounded spirituality, emotional maturity, and devotion to service.
Chasing relationships with unawakened beings leads us to repeat painful cycles. Drama becomes addictive, our nervous systems start equating intensity with aliveness, and we remain trapped in suffering rather than experiencing the true richness of conscious partnership.
But this episode offers a simple reflection to help you begin the journey toward recognising genuine awakening, both in yourself and in a potential partner.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Cycle Breaker’s Path
A 2½-hour immersive workshop to heal your lineage, step into your calling, and reclaim your light.
The Awakened Masculine Program
An 8-week immersive journey into the depths of unleashing your awakened masculine power
Transcript
How to recognize an awakened man or woman?
Speaker:This episode is for both men and women.
Speaker:How can you truly recognize when a man is awakened or at a
Speaker:certain level of consciousness?
Speaker:Or a woman is awakened at a certain level of consciousness where they are
Speaker:mature enough, conscious enough to actually be in a deep relationship,
Speaker:in a committed, devoted relationship?
Speaker:There are many similarities between them.
Speaker:The essence is shared.
Speaker:But there are also key nuances, subtle differences, and I will go into
Speaker:those in a very practical way today.
Speaker:Because it's not a checklist.
Speaker:It's not, oh, he or she understands this and has read this book, or.
Speaker:That might be great and there is nothing wrong with that.
Speaker:But it's much deeper.
Speaker:It's about embodiment.
Speaker:So ultimately the question becomes, how can we truly see whether one
Speaker:is embodied or actually living the spiritual journey, rather than
Speaker:talking or projecting an image of it?
Speaker:That is what today's episode is about.
Speaker:An important disclaimer: when I use the word awakened woman,
Speaker:awakened man, awakened being, it's important to bring awareness.
Speaker:Awakening is also a good way to put it.
Speaker:I'm not saying awakened, you reach a certain stage and
Speaker:then you are above others.
Speaker:There will be a ego game.
Speaker:There is no hierarchy and this is not about, now I'm
Speaker:awakened, so I don't do anything.
Speaker:We're always in evolution.
Speaker:We're always awakening and expanding.
Speaker:I'm referring to a reaching a certain level of consciousness and healing
Speaker:in our awakening journey where we are truly led by something deeper within
Speaker:us, where we are ready for a deeper level of intimacy , depth, meaning
Speaker:service, and even abundance in this life.
Speaker:Welcome to the Masculine and Feminine Dynamics podcast.
Speaker:My name is Lorin Krenn.
Speaker:I'm an author, coach, and hypnotherapist.
Speaker:I help you to understand masculine and feminine dynamics at the deepest level.
Speaker:Let's dive in.
Speaker:It all begins with integrity.
Speaker:An awakened man or woman lives with total integrity , radical honesty
Speaker:toward others and themselves, does not engage in lying to themselves or
Speaker:others, does not engage in manipulation.
Speaker:Integrity is the embodiment and the true found foundation of spirituality,
Speaker:of being an awakened being.
Speaker:Awakening and spiritual depth without integrity is ultimately a form of
Speaker:bypassing, a form of intellectual avoidance and ego spirituality.
Speaker:An awakened man or woman, both would rather speak their truth even when it
Speaker:costs them something, because living in truth and integrity, which is also
Speaker:living in love, the highest love, is the biggest and highest virtue of all.
Speaker:So this kind of saying of selling your soul, and I'm not necessarily
Speaker:referring to it as other people might refer to it, but I'm giving you an
Speaker:example of, of changing who you are.
Speaker:Kind of not honoring your true virtues and values and not building your life around
Speaker:that, around truth, around integrity, around love, and the higher consciousness.
Speaker:Then really what's happening is that we are abandoning our soul , we're abandoning
Speaker:our truth, and an awakened being by definition is just not going to do that.
Speaker:There is a true wholehearted devotion to that that is almost an
Speaker:unwavering element in their life.
Speaker:No matter what happens, I'm not gonna suddenly be out of integrity,
Speaker:manipulate, lie to myself or others.
Speaker:This is just not part of this life.
Speaker:This is not part of the way I choose to live my life.
Speaker:Because I know the pain of not being honest with oneself.
Speaker:I know the pain of projecting, um, persona or an image based on how others
Speaker:are gonna perceive you so that they validate you, so they approve of you.
Speaker:And that's just something that's not going to happen with an awakened soul.
Speaker:They're not going to compromise, never, on the virtue of truth,
Speaker:integrity, and love, and total honesty.
Speaker:That is set in stone.
Speaker:If that is not something a person embodies, then it doesn't mean they're
Speaker:bad necessarily because yes, some people deliberately manipulate others,
Speaker:but I'm not talking about this today.
Speaker:Other people, they lie to themselves.
Speaker:And when you lie to yourself, you will naturally lie to others and you won't
Speaker:even think, oh, I'm not being honest with myself, i'm living out of integrity.
Speaker:It's not like you're thinking that and then doing it.
Speaker:It's unconscious.
Speaker:Not an excuse.
Speaker:Yes, but also not every person who engages in unconscious behavior is
Speaker:doing this out of malicious intent.
Speaker:They're simply still on the journey.
Speaker:But if a person is still not entirely honest secretive doesn't treat others in
Speaker:life with full integrity, that reveals an ultimate mirror of their embodiment,
Speaker:not to judge them, but a clear mirror of where they might be in their journey.
Speaker:Which leads us into the topic of spirituality.
Speaker:For both the awakened man, woman, or awakened soul, spirituality is
Speaker:lived, it is not performed , it is not an ego projection.
Speaker:Look at me, how spiritual I am.
Speaker:I'm awakened, I'm this or that.
Speaker:It's not stacking up more labels or more identities.
Speaker:There is no hierarchy, there is no conceptualizing, there is no using kind
Speaker:of spiritual depth against the other and seen as more evolved than the other.
Speaker:That is always an ego dynamic.
Speaker:It has nothing to do with true embodiment.
Speaker:The hallmark of true embodiment is actually, not that you don't speak
Speaker:about spirituality, because it can be beautiful to speak about it.
Speaker:But the emphasis is on actually living and embodying spirituality rather than
Speaker:projecting an image of spirituality.
Speaker:The emphasis is on actually being present, actually opening your heart,
Speaker:actually practicing devotion, surrender, whatever it is, rather than talking
Speaker:about it or projecting an image about it, or being seen as more than.
Speaker:Their spirituality, in other words, is grounded in a way embodied.
Speaker:It's humble.
Speaker:It's both deeply human and relatable and yet so practical.
Speaker:It's really more in the moment in, in conflict, in challenging
Speaker:situations when life or the universe or the creator is testing us.
Speaker:It's repair after an argument, it's mature ways of, of seeing the
Speaker:imperfect nature of relationships and not, expecting a fantasy.
Speaker:It's, and there's so much more to this, but their spirituality is truly grounded
Speaker:and humble, and very, very practical.
Speaker:And that's important.
Speaker:If someone's spirituality is not practical, but it's extremely abstract
Speaker:and it's all up in the clouds, but their life is total chaos,
Speaker:unorganized in a total disaster and chaotic mess, then no judgment, but
Speaker:it usually means it's not embodied.
Speaker:It's not part of who they are yet.
Speaker:Maybe they've accessed the peak experiences, but those peak experiences
Speaker:haven't been integrated yet.
Speaker:The embodied being doesn't care about a peak experience anymore.
Speaker:They care about how can I actually expand all of this in the day to day,
Speaker:in the most mundane moments of all.
Speaker:Emotional maturity . And that is very important.
Speaker:An awakened woman or man does not engage in some drama.
Speaker:An awakened man or woman or being ultimately, hardly engages
Speaker:in any emotional drama anymore.
Speaker:Drama, big fights, big projecting of emotions.
Speaker:All these are usually still signs that there is something inside that
Speaker:wants to be seen, that wants to be validated, that wants to be held, but
Speaker:it's expressed in a unconscious way.
Speaker:It's expressed in a wounded way that causes more pain.
Speaker:And paradoxically, these cycles of pain and drama and everything is a disaster
Speaker:and all is falling apart, and then everything is fine again, these cycles.
Speaker:we can get almost addicted to them because they're a form of avoiding our
Speaker:own addiction to drama, to emotional drama because many of us are addicted to
Speaker:some kind of emotional drama in our life.
Speaker:Because remove all of that and suddenly you are really faced in
Speaker:the stillness with your own being.
Speaker:Many people don't realize this, but when life is going amazing,
Speaker:then many people feel bored.
Speaker:They need the drama, and it's not that an amazing life or an abundant life
Speaker:full of love, full of abundance in every possible dimension is boring.
Speaker:It's just that the nervous system from the past is still equating
Speaker:richness of fullness of life with some chaotic intensity and emotionally
Speaker:charged pain and cycles of suffering.
Speaker:And really the path of awakening is to realize, I don't want this anymore.
Speaker:I really don't want to engage in that anymore, so I'm gonna do whatever
Speaker:it takes to own my responsibility.
Speaker:Because almost every dynamic in the relationship is co-created in
Speaker:some shape or form, except abuse.
Speaker:Yes, the person who is being abused is unconscious of what is happening, but to
Speaker:say they're co-creating it and enabling the other person is a very gray area
Speaker:and something I don't agree with, of course, we all have, every dynamic is
Speaker:co-created in some shape or form, but where there is gaslighting or narcissist
Speaker:dynamics, the conversation changes, right?
Speaker:So that's not what I'm talking about.
Speaker:But apart from those dynamics where it's deliberate, everything is co-created,
Speaker:even if it comes primarily from the other person, the other person is still
Speaker:engaging with it in some capacity.
Speaker:Their own wounding is partaking in it.
Speaker:So the awakened man or woman or being really comes to this
Speaker:place of I no longer want this.
Speaker:You might even have said that in a relationship.
Speaker:You might even say that to yourself.
Speaker:I'm done with this.
Speaker:I'm not going to go back to that same place of suffering and repeat
Speaker:this cycle again and again and again.
Speaker:It's just not going to happen.
Speaker:And when you truly make that choice, not, oh, I don't want it, ah, yeah,
Speaker:but really from the depths of your being, then something happens.
Speaker:Because in that moment the deepest part of your being, starts to look for an answer.
Speaker:And trust me, you can always find an answer to these things, but the devotion
Speaker:has to be equally intense as the pain that you experienced, I like to say.
Speaker:When the devotion to work through it and find a, not an intellectual, but spiritual
Speaker:and deeper embodied answer to move and transcend this, it has to be equally
Speaker:intense, otherwise it stands no chance against that pain and repeated suffering.
Speaker:This doesn't mean that an awakened man or woman is perfectly healed,
Speaker:but it does mean that one of the key areas of focus and priorities in
Speaker:their life is to ensure to actually work through these bigger dramas
Speaker:that keep resurfacing in their life.
Speaker:To ask the deeper question, what is my responsibility here?
Speaker:What is the lesson I need to learn?
Speaker:To have an open mind and heart to expanding with humbleness.
Speaker:Also realizing that, um, we all have our flaws and our lessons
Speaker:to learn as a soul in this life.
Speaker:Another Hallmark sign is devotion and service.
Speaker:Every awakened being has a service and devotion in some way to something
Speaker:greater than themselves, a deeper meaning in life that there is, there's
Speaker:something that almost one part of them is in this world, and the other part is
Speaker:rooted in a higher vision of, of love and of evolution, of consciousness.
Speaker:And it doesn't matter what label you give that.
Speaker:It doesn't matter what you call it.
Speaker:What matters is that you can truly, um, feel it.
Speaker:That you can truly bring this into everyday life.
Speaker:And, and, and through it, not only transform yourself, but transform
Speaker:the lives of all those who you touch.
Speaker:My work and everything I do is informed by something greater than myself.
Speaker:Me as a person ? Okay, maybe I know a few things and, but there is something
Speaker:deeper inside that I feel connected to, that is guiding me on this path.
Speaker:A deeper knowing, so to speak, a surrender to the higher calling within as a soul.
Speaker:And that is deeply, deeply humbling.
Speaker:And you can see that flicker in the eyes of the one who is perhaps
Speaker:imperfectly as we all are, but connected and accessing this deeper calling.
Speaker:And that doesn't mean it's something grand or special.
Speaker:Everything is special.
Speaker:But what I mean by that is it's not measured by numbers or people or
Speaker:metrics or being doing something big.
Speaker:It's, it's something you feel.
Speaker:And you see it in someone's eyes, there is just a, a flicker.
Speaker:There is a, there's a love, there's a light, there's a radiance, there's,
Speaker:there's something that, um, that really touches you very, very deeply.
Speaker:It's something that moves you.
Speaker:Now these are the shared ones, and of course there are many, many more.
Speaker:But from here as the final piece here, let's actually go into the
Speaker:difference of embodiment as the feminine and as the masculine.
Speaker:And I use heterosexual language here for simplicity and also poetic reasons, but
Speaker:just know we all carry these energies within us and they're not gender specific.
Speaker:They awakened feminine and they awakened masculine express very differently.
Speaker:The awakened woman is very different in communication than the awakened man.
Speaker:And if we put a blank label and say the awakened woman is always grounded in
Speaker:calm and steady in conversation, and so is the man, then we're doing a huge
Speaker:disservice of truly understanding the difference between these energetics,
Speaker:the masculine and the feminine.
Speaker:The feminine is all about embodiment.
Speaker:It's not about how composed she is and how much she controls her speech and how
Speaker:steady she is, it's more about how alive she is, her body is deeply expressive,
Speaker:connected to the full range of life.
Speaker:She is alive, she is embodied, she feels everything, grief, joy, pleasure,
Speaker:fear, and she doesn't suppress any of this to appear spiritual.
Speaker:And for a long time as part of the suppression of the feminine, we've
Speaker:actually put this kind of blank label.
Speaker:Or when a woman embodies that, it means she's still not awakened.
Speaker:But that is not true.
Speaker:Feminine embodiment is very different than masculine embodiment.
Speaker:Where the masculine at a very awakened or conscious state of being is very grounded,
Speaker:steady, and has a more linear kind of unwavering, grounded presence , the
Speaker:feminine fluctuates much more, not because of a loss of control, but she embodies the
Speaker:full spectrum and the full range of life.
Speaker:And this is so powerful because both.
Speaker:Actually have their weaknesses here.
Speaker:The masculine can get stuck in the mind and become too rigid, and there's no
Speaker:room for life, there's no room for the full experience, to really feel and to be
Speaker:nourished and to receive fully, to let go.
Speaker:Everything needs to be controlled and tight and rigid.
Speaker:And the feminine can also, in her full expression of life notice maybe
Speaker:that there is a lack of grounding and her voice can become perhaps, I
Speaker:don't wanna say too sharp, but it's no longer the sharpness of her intuition.
Speaker:It's almost like she is, there is no grounding of the storm inside her.
Speaker:And I always have to be mindful of how I speak about this because unfortunately,
Speaker:because we've heard so much nonsense about women are unpredictable, women
Speaker:have mood issues and all these things, all these nonsense, I believe truly is
Speaker:born out of a total lack of understanding of the difference between feminine
Speaker:embodiment and masculine embodiment.
Speaker:An awakened woman or an awakened man have a very different state of embodiment.
Speaker:They have very similar ideals and virtues, but their expression and how
Speaker:they communicate differs very often.
Speaker:And that is the beauty.
Speaker:Being different creates an incredible charge and magnetism.
Speaker:And it's also how we evolve and learn.
Speaker:Because the feminine teaches the masculine to get out of rigidity, stuck in the
Speaker:mind, everything needs to be controlled.
Speaker:And the masculine helps the feminine to create a container, to create a sense of
Speaker:safety and, and perhaps even structure around the, the sheer force of, her full
Speaker:range of, of expression, her capacity to, to feel so deeply, but without losing
Speaker:herself in feeling and experiencing life at such a deep and intense level.
Speaker:So this interdependence between the two is really, this difference is the
Speaker:charge that connects them, and it's also the invitation for both to learn
Speaker:from each other and to evolve together.
Speaker:It doesn't mean one is better, one is more advanced, one is more awakened.
Speaker:It means both have strengths where the other usually has
Speaker:a weakness and vice versa.
Speaker:Leading into the masculine, the awakened masculine on the other hand,
Speaker:I, I talked about this already, but it's defined by a depth of presence.
Speaker:There's a sense of grounded clarity.
Speaker:He's more steady.
Speaker:He's also a human being with emotions, but there is more
Speaker:sense of unwavering steadiness.
Speaker:He doesn't chase, he doesn't collapse, he doesn't perform to prove himself.
Speaker:He's here, he's steady.
Speaker:He knows who he is, he knows what he wants, he knows where he's going.
Speaker:He is rooted in something more powerful than himself.
Speaker:He's able to listen deeply, to hold space deeply, and to
Speaker:protect fiercely if necessary.
Speaker:The feminine feels safe around him, not because he's agreeable or
Speaker:talks about safety and divinity or holding space, but because he lives
Speaker:and embodies his highest truth.
Speaker:And that truth is deeply magnetic, that grounded clarity is deeply safe.
Speaker:She knows exactly where she is at with him, so to speak.
Speaker:So we can say in essence, the awakened feminine moves life, the
Speaker:awakened masculine anchors life.
Speaker:That's why in ancient traditions, the feminine is the river, the current,
Speaker:the masculine is the river bed.
Speaker:The feminine is the wave, the masculine is the shore, is the
Speaker:rock that receives the wave.
Speaker:The feminine is the weather and its many expressions, the
Speaker:masculine is the mountain.
Speaker:These are just metaphors from nature.
Speaker:Don't take them too literally, you could change them up completely.
Speaker:You could even say the feminine is the mountain and find a different
Speaker:metaphor for that and why that is.
Speaker:It doesn't matter.
Speaker:It's just about speaking and giving words to a deep state of
Speaker:embodiment that is viscerally and, and somatically felt ultimately.
Speaker:And when those two meet the awakened masculine and the awakened
Speaker:feminine, there is recognition.
Speaker:It's not about words or appearances.
Speaker:There's something deeply energetic, something undeniable.
Speaker:Not one is better than the other, both are sacred and both are needed.
Speaker:And the more a woman awakens, the more she's deeply at home in that
Speaker:feminine embodiment that I have described, experiencing life fully,
Speaker:no longer explaining or justifying her experience or trying to be or
Speaker:changing or second guessing herself.
Speaker:And it's the same for the masculine.
Speaker:None of them are perfect, but they're humble enough to always have their
Speaker:mind heart open to learning, to expansion, and especially new and in
Speaker:relationship to learn from each other, and therefore to evolve individually
Speaker:and inevitably together as one.
Speaker:The awakened man and woman or being all share the same virtues and the very
Speaker:similar depth, but feminine expression differs from masculine expression, and
Speaker:it's here because in the dance, in the meeting of each other, there is truly,
Speaker:from the depths of my own experience, the most profound transformation
Speaker:and liberation of our own soul.
Speaker:And when we understand that, that we are so similar, but at the same
Speaker:time so different, there is just an incredible mystical beauty in that.
Speaker:There is an endless novelty, but not a novelty that is shiny or pleasurable,
Speaker:something much, much deeper.
Speaker:You recognize an awakened woman, all those things that I mentioned,
Speaker:and her being at home in that expression, and the same with a man.
Speaker:Their presence, their energy, their level of consciousness becomes undeniable.
Speaker:There isn't even a question, and they all have things to learn.
Speaker:I, you everyone, but there's no avoidance or hiding of any of that, but
Speaker:rather fully embrace and a courageous facing all that needs to be faced
Speaker:in the name of love and awakening.
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