Why Old Souls Cannot Date and What Actually Works Instead
Conventional dating simply doesn't work for old souls. The games, pretending, and shallow dynamics that are normalised in modern dating are completely draining for spiritually mature people who are oriented toward truth and authenticity.
People who continue pursuing conventional dating methods often find themselves in a cycle of frustration and misalignment. This lower vibration attracts more of the same energy, leading to wasted time with incompatible partners. The resistance created from this frustration only pushes the right person further away.
If you’re an old soul, you have permission to stop forcing yourself into misaligned dating experiences and instead focus on living truthfully. When we align with our soul's purpose and truth, we naturally attract the right person through resonance rather than performance. Old souls are meant to meet, not search or chase.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Awakened Masculine Program
An 8-week immersive journey into the depths of unleashing your awakened masculine power
Healing Your Relationship with the Masculine
A 4-week immersive program for women
Transcript
Old souls cannot do conventional dating.
Speaker:It simply does not work.
Speaker:Conventional dating is a normalized form of shallowness.
Speaker:Playing hard to get, engaging in some kind of ego dynamics, which for a spiritually
Speaker:mature person is extremely draining.
Speaker:Now, this doesn't mean that you should give up on dating altogether,
Speaker:it's never black and white.
Speaker:This episode is about a deeper solution, not just why conventional dating is
Speaker:shallow and doesn't really work for a spiritually mature person and all soul,
Speaker:but also what is the deeper answer?
Speaker:What can you actually do that is giving you energy, that is allowing you to be
Speaker:in highest alignment around this topic.
Speaker:Dating meeting someone where so many, even very spiritually mature people engage in
Speaker:limiting beliefs, actions that drain them and are simply totally out of alignment.
Speaker:And if I may so say so, even a waste of time.
Speaker:If you are listening.
Speaker:And you are not yet subscribed to the show, I invite you to subscribe now
Speaker:so you never miss the next episode.
Speaker:Thank you for being here.
Speaker:Welcome to the Masculine and Feminine Dynamics podcast.
Speaker:My name is Lorin Krenn and I'm a coach, author, and hypnotherapist.
Speaker:I help you to understand masculine and feminine dynamics at the deepest level.
Speaker:Let's dive in.
Speaker:As an old soul, your whole being is orientated toward truth.
Speaker:This means that just the idea of conventional dating, which includes all
Speaker:these ego games and playing hard to get and performing someone who you are not
Speaker:wanting to get something, be seen in a certain way, all of that is misalignment.
Speaker:All of that is the opposite of truth, and truth is the highest frequency.
Speaker:Truth is the authentic vibration of our soul.
Speaker:So as an old soul, as a spiritually mature person, you cannot engage in any of that.
Speaker:It isn't a game to you, because it shouldn't be a game.
Speaker:It is simply about either meeting in truth or you simply cannot
Speaker:meet, and it isn't in alignment.
Speaker:And this is why so many old souls have this really misaligned experience in
Speaker:dating, because they're trying to mold themselves into some kind of conventional
Speaker:dating and doing what everyone else is doing, maybe swiping through dating apps,
Speaker:the fear of missing out, needing to be seen, putting yourself out there, whatever
Speaker:on earth that is supposed to mean.
Speaker:And as they engage in that, it's just draining them of their energy.
Speaker:And maybe they meet people, but they meet not the people who are in alignment.
Speaker:This is why also you might struggle with small talk and there's nothing wrong
Speaker:with small talk because being serious and heavy all the time is not, has nothing
Speaker:to do with being spiritually mature.
Speaker:There will be another trap to fall into.
Speaker:Of course there is room for playfulness, goofiness, playful banter, whatever,
Speaker:but it's not at the absence or at the cost of meaning or depth, you have both.
Speaker:You have truth and you have playfulness, right?
Speaker:It's not about some kind of heavy sitting down and just speaking the highest truth.
Speaker:That will be another illusion or limitation.
Speaker:It's really about both, but just engaging in small talk or talking
Speaker:some nonsense that doesn't really mean anything to you, that's not something
Speaker:you can easily, most likely engage in.
Speaker:Also you can sense when someone is not being who they truly are, whether there is
Speaker:insecurity behind that, whether there is a being seen in a certain way, wanting to
Speaker:get something from you, whatever that is, that energy will register inside your body
Speaker:and nervous system as off as misaligned.
Speaker:You feel like, hmm, something isn't right.
Speaker:And that something isn't right is draining you of your energy because
Speaker:you start scanning what's happening.
Speaker:You are not able to relax.
Speaker:You're not able to surrender to the experience and be fully present.
Speaker:You are sensing in that moment that something is draining your energy.
Speaker:So rather than trying to mold yourself into something or staying in these
Speaker:scenarios, I invite you to give yourself full permission to listen
Speaker:to that sensation in your body.
Speaker:If you sense that there isn't congruence, even though the MI right words might
Speaker:be said to you, if you sense that the other person is not truly coming
Speaker:from their highest truth for you are not coming from your highest truth,
Speaker:that's when you have full permission to let go or to, well, it's about
Speaker:yourself, check in with yourself.
Speaker:Why you are partaking in these unconscious ego games.
Speaker:Why do you believe maybe in your subconscious that you have to do this?
Speaker:Because you don't have.
Speaker:To do it.
Speaker:You don't have to waste your time, your breath, your presence on such experiences.
Speaker:I once heard someone say you gotta have hundreds of hundreds of date,
Speaker:and then you will find the right person speaking in statistics.
Speaker:That is complete utter bullshit.
Speaker:If you look at the laws of energy, the laws of manifestation, yes, if you believe
Speaker:that all is about statistics, then by all means go out there, swipe through
Speaker:a million faces and meet 500 people.
Speaker:I couldn't think of anything more disconnected and anything
Speaker:more time consuming, essence consuming, soul consuming.
Speaker:I can tell you this, you being in highest alignment and walking into a
Speaker:coffee shop has a much higher chance of you meeting the right person than
Speaker:you wasting time being in places that drain you, speaking to people where you
Speaker:sense they're not coming from truth.
Speaker:All of that is a waste of energy and is a waste of time.
Speaker:When I thought I had to put myself out there, all I got was that same frequency.
Speaker:I need to put myself out there.
Speaker:Limitation.
Speaker:I need to go looking, looking, looking, chasing, chasing.
Speaker:So what do we find?
Speaker:We find usually that same vibration we are coming from.
Speaker:Instead, I invite you to give yourself permission to let all of that go.
Speaker:You don't have to be anywhere.
Speaker:You don't have to meet anyone that isn't alignment.
Speaker:You don't have to be on dating apps and swipe through a thousand faces.
Speaker:You don't have to do anything that doesn't fit in alignment
Speaker:and that drains your energy.
Speaker:If we start with this, then by nature we're already elevating our vibration and
Speaker:our consciousness, because we're giving ourselves permission to no longer engage
Speaker:in things that are out of alignment.
Speaker:The fear of missing out, the idea that you need to go out there and look and
Speaker:chase or whatever is all rooted in some form of scarcity, in some form of control.
Speaker:You're trying to control the process in order to get to.
Speaker:The mind wants predictability, and these kind of doing these things gives
Speaker:the mind some kind of, oh yeah, this should be working because I'm doing X,
Speaker:Y, and Z. But that's not how this works.
Speaker:This is a deep spiritual process.
Speaker:This is all about energy.
Speaker:If you feel it, go to the party, go to the place, go to the
Speaker:gathering, go to the whatever.
Speaker:But you need to feel congruence.
Speaker:You need to feel that this is a match.
Speaker:You need to feel that something is calling you to go there.
Speaker:Give yourself permission to really check in with yourself.
Speaker:It's not about having some spiritual label and saying I don't do this.
Speaker:I don't do that.
Speaker:No, it's fine.
Speaker:You can go out and be seen, but it has to feel in alignment.
Speaker:It has to feel right, rather than frustration or despair
Speaker:or thinking you need to chase.
Speaker:And when you do that then, then your whole energy and presence just totally shifts.
Speaker:And, and then when you go out, it's just your energy, so much more mag magnetic.
Speaker:You, you draw the right person.
Speaker:If they are there in that moment, it's meant to be, that person will see you.
Speaker:Now let's go into something else that is really important to understand, and I
Speaker:think this is a confusion for many people.
Speaker:You will often hear kind of ideas of modern dating if you, uh, make sure you
Speaker:take a lot of time with that person, go very slow, don't get attached too fast.
Speaker:Do not feel too much too soon, and this can all be helpful.
Speaker:Listen, of course, because if you have a history of going with what feels familiar
Speaker:to your nervous system, perhaps in your childhood feeling abandoned, having to
Speaker:earn love, or whatever the wound that or the injury was in your psyche, uh, at a
Speaker:spiritual, energetic level, then it makes sense to take things slow, listen to
Speaker:your body and listen to your intuition.
Speaker:But I will say this.
Speaker:Again, this can be seen as a the mind try, kind of trying to control it.
Speaker:You can still make the wrong choice even if you take more time.
Speaker:So what I'm trying to say here, there isn't the black and white rule.
Speaker:You can give yourself permission to go deep fast, so you don't
Speaker:have to wait before you go deep.
Speaker:You can go deep immediately.
Speaker:And in fact, by going deep immediately embodying your truth, really speaking
Speaker:what is important to you, by doing that, you very quickly are actually
Speaker:able to identify whether that might be.
Speaker:In alignment.
Speaker:So don't hold onto the kind of ideas the mind trying to control
Speaker:and for it to be predictable.
Speaker:And yes, if you have a history and you wanna take things slow, by all means
Speaker:do so, but don't allow this to become a limitation or to slow you down.
Speaker:If you feel a very strong energetic resonance with that person, then,
Speaker:by all means go deep and go fast, meaning go fast, go deeply fastly.
Speaker:Because very quickly you'll be able to tell whether this is in alignment.
Speaker:And of course some people might not say, what if you're
Speaker:confusing trauma with chemistry?
Speaker:What if you are missing the red flags?
Speaker:What if you are doing this?
Speaker:What if you are doing that?
Speaker:I get it.
Speaker:However, you have to be able to trust your internal system.
Speaker:And whether you date them for 20 years or you date them for six months, at some
Speaker:point you will be able to identify whether something is not incongruence or not.
Speaker:If you are falling for potential, if you are falling for old wounds, then
Speaker:what it is showing you is that you are still not yet rooted in truth.
Speaker:Because at the highest level, you are meant to drop into truth
Speaker:immediately and see things as they are.
Speaker:So I'm not saying go and move in with someone immediately without understanding
Speaker:how they are and seeing their consistency, but I am saying drop into truth
Speaker:immediately and watch what happens.
Speaker:Watch the response, right?
Speaker:Express what you truly want and design a relationship immediately.
Speaker:Say who you are and what you want immediately.
Speaker:Lay all cards on the table immediately,
Speaker:and then trust your internal compass based on the response you receive to that.
Speaker:Again, some people might get triggered, but this has nothing to
Speaker:do with losing yourself in potential.
Speaker:It has everything to do with finding out as quickly as possible whether this is
Speaker:in alignment, rather than wasting time.
Speaker:And when I say wasting time, I have to be very, very clear here.
Speaker:Some people see this as selfish.
Speaker:Oh, who you think you are?
Speaker:Don't waste time.
Speaker:I'm so important.
Speaker:Yes, you are that important.
Speaker:The deeper your soul, the sooner you will feel whether there
Speaker:is resonance with another.
Speaker:And of course, you need to look for consistency and resonance
Speaker:on two dates is not enough.
Speaker:This needs to be ongoingly of course, but very quickly if you really
Speaker:unapologetically embody your truth and lay all cards on the table,
Speaker:you can see, can we go deeper?
Speaker:And then you go deeper.
Speaker:And as you go deeper, you will see again, can we go deeper or can we not go deeper?
Speaker:You'll be able to identify it very, very quickly.
Speaker:This is very different than what other dating coaches or dating advice might
Speaker:be, but I'm speaking to you from a place of being really dropped into your
Speaker:intuition, laying all cards on the table and no longer engaging in any eco games.
Speaker:Lay all cards on the table and you'll be able to see very quickly.
Speaker:If you can go deeper.
Speaker:You might not immediately.
Speaker:This might not immediately mean forever.
Speaker:You might be able to go deep with that person for a while, but then
Speaker:notice the consistency is lacking.
Speaker:Either way, what you're doing is you are seeking alignment and
Speaker:deeper truth as quickly as possible.
Speaker:On this path as a spiritually mature, awakened person, as an
Speaker:old soul, you might actually go through stretches of walking alone.
Speaker:You might notice that you try to mold and push yourself into meeting
Speaker:other people, but your soul is calling you more into solitude.
Speaker:Your soul is calling you inwards rather than outwards.
Speaker:This is another reason why.
Speaker:It can feel so out of alignment for you because when your soul is pulling you
Speaker:inwards and you're trying to go outwards and to be seen, it feels completely
Speaker:out of integrity with your own energy.
Speaker:It feels completely disconnected and, um, out of sync with your deeper essence.
Speaker:So it's very normal for old souls to go through stretches where they are not
Speaker:seen, except maybe seen by nature, seen by some meaningful friends or family.
Speaker:And you can trust that, because during that period, you're doing the very same
Speaker:as when you are in an ex, when you are being seen because you are shifting your
Speaker:energy, you are learning things about yourself and going deeper into your being.
Speaker:Going deeper into your being is never wasted time.
Speaker:Yes, it might seem that in that moment you are not increasing the chances
Speaker:of being seen, but I would argue that the deeper you go into your
Speaker:being, the more magnetic you become to the right person in your life.
Speaker:So just check in with yourself.
Speaker:If you're currently in an inward period, you can trust it.
Speaker:Don't put a label to this.
Speaker:I am now in an inward period.
Speaker:I'm not gonna see anyone, because that tool will limit you.
Speaker:That tool is the mind looking for predictability.
Speaker:You can be inward, but then the right person comes, fuck it.
Speaker:You go deep with them.
Speaker:Or why would you say no, i'm in an inward period?
Speaker:These are all constructs and illusions The mind creates to protect itself.
Speaker:Attach spiritual labels to it.
Speaker:But if right now it feels so out of alignment to go and see someone or engage
Speaker:in dating, trust the inward process.
Speaker:You are doing actually much more meaningful work than someone else
Speaker:who is thinking in statistics and meeting as many people as
Speaker:possible and draining their energy.
Speaker:Old souls are meant to meet and never to search or to chase.
Speaker:This reframe can shift everything.
Speaker:You are not meant to date in volume.
Speaker:You are not meant to browse and look in all kinds of dating, uh,
Speaker:websites or applications or whatever.
Speaker:You are meant to live so truthfully, so in alignment with your soul's
Speaker:truth, your soul's calling and your soul's purpose, that from that place
Speaker:you naturally call that person you in, you naturally meet that person.
Speaker:Anything that doesn't feel natural can be a sign that you are stepping out
Speaker:of alignment with your true essence.
Speaker:You want to meet them through resonance, through alignment, through
Speaker:life, and never through performance.
Speaker:There is no strategy.
Speaker:There is no framework.
Speaker:There is no plan.
Speaker:There is nothing.
Speaker:There is just you being in alignment with your soul's truth and your soul's
Speaker:calling and your soul's purpose.
Speaker:And from that place your trust and surrender that you will
Speaker:meet the right person, that you will draw them into your life.
Speaker:Now, I know this is easier said than done.
Speaker:I know that this is not straightforward because there is a deep spiritual answer
Speaker:and truth to this subject ultimately that you have to find inside yourself.
Speaker:Now when you give yourself permission to no longer engage in anything that feels
Speaker:draining or to go inwards when you feel that it is time to go inwards into your
Speaker:being, that in itself already raises your vibration and raises your frequency.
Speaker:From that place, you become more magnetic and you attract much more powerfully.
Speaker:You increase the chances of manifesting them or drawing them
Speaker:into your life infinite fault.
Speaker:Then from that place, you allow yourself to go deep, fast.
Speaker:Not to abandon yourself or believe in, in a fantasy or potential,
Speaker:but to see is this in alignment?
Speaker:Can we truly go deep?
Speaker:Why would you hold back?
Speaker:Why would you not lay all your cards on the table and reveal all of who you are?
Speaker:Because in that, you giving the other person permission to do the same.
Speaker:And if they can meet you there, phenomenal.
Speaker:If they can't meet you there, cut the energetic tie.
Speaker:You can do this with the highest integrity.
Speaker:You can do this from a total place of truth, but if you linger around, if you
Speaker:try to make it work, even though you realize that this person cannot meet
Speaker:you at the depth and level of truth and resonance that you are seeking,
Speaker:then you are simply wasting your time in places that drain your energy.
Speaker:Then you give up altogether the idea of chasing or looking for them, and
Speaker:instead you allow yourself to meet them.
Speaker:And that in itself shifts already your energy and vibration, because what you're
Speaker:ultimately saying is that you surrender and trust that you will eventually, when
Speaker:the timing is right, the intelligence of the universe of the creator decides
Speaker:that, that you will meet them in the right place and at the right time.
Speaker:Some people say everything is predestined.
Speaker:Other people say that you create your own destiny.
Speaker:I say there is a middle ground.
Speaker:There is most likely for every person who seeks that divine union and
Speaker:partnership, that divine partner there.
Speaker:When exactly they will meet them, how exactly it is going to be and when
Speaker:it is is outside of your control.
Speaker:And yet conventional dating focuses so much on the when on the how, and on the
Speaker:control aspects on the ego dynamics.
Speaker:If you let go of all of that and you simply focus on alignment, you never
Speaker:chase, you give yourself permission to let go of anything that drains
Speaker:your energy, then you create the highest possibility of meeting them.
Speaker:And this here is an incredibly important energetic law of the universe.
Speaker:If right now you feel frustrated because you don't meet them yet, you need to
Speaker:take an honest look at that energy.
Speaker:Because that energy is telling you that you are not in acceptance
Speaker:with how the process is unfolding.
Speaker:You are not in acceptance with the when and how.
Speaker:You're trying to hold on.
Speaker:You're saying it shouldn't be this way, which creates resistance, and
Speaker:that resistance creates misalignment.
Speaker:And from that misalignment, you might then engage in actions that make you feel
Speaker:even more disconnected and misaligned.
Speaker:So all you have to do is focus your energy on alignment and keep your energy
Speaker:there and don't allow any advice or another person, or another influence
Speaker:to pull you out of that energy.
Speaker:And when you can be in that energy, you are vibrating at a higher frequency.
Speaker:You're not chasing, you are becoming a vibrational match for the right person.
Speaker:And if it happens tomorrow, nice.
Speaker:If it happens in one year, nice.
Speaker:If it takes longer, yes, you can feel an ache and a deep desire, but it
Speaker:doesn't mean you have to live in pain.
Speaker:It doesn't mean you have to live in resistance.
Speaker:That is the energy to focus on.
Speaker:If you focus on that, it is a million times and beyond more meaningful
Speaker:and impactful then dating a lot of people, swiping through a lot of
Speaker:dating apps or any of that stuff.
Speaker:Now, last thing I will say here is do not create rules.
Speaker:You might actually meet the right person who knows through an Instagram
Speaker:DM, through whatever, who knows?
Speaker:There is no right or wrong.
Speaker:The universe doesn't say, oh, you met them through a dating app,
Speaker:so it's not your divine union.
Speaker:Who cares about that nonsense?
Speaker:That's just our own perception and judgment.
Speaker:You might meet them through technology.
Speaker:You might meet them in a coffee shop.
Speaker:It doesn't matter.
Speaker:What matters is there is resonance.
Speaker:What matters is there is alignment.
Speaker:What matters is that you are in alignment with your soul's
Speaker:calling and your soul's truth.
Speaker:Forget about the rest.
Speaker:Focus only on that, and you make it inevitable that you find the right person.
Speaker:This is how you date.
Speaker:It's very simple.
Speaker:It's very straightforward, but it requires, again, recalibration and
Speaker:recalibration and recalibration because the world advise other people, limiting
Speaker:beliefs, conditioning, wounding, they pull you out of that energy they make
Speaker:you think, I have to do something, I have to control the process.
Speaker:No you don't.
Speaker:The more you control, the more you lower your energy, the less you try to control
Speaker:and drop into your soul's truth, the more powerful your energy becomes, the more
Speaker:powerful you manifest, and that's it.
Speaker:Thank you for listening to these episodes.
Speaker:If you are not subscribed yet, subscribe now to the show so
Speaker:you'll never miss the next episode.
Speaker:It's a true honor to be of service in your journey.
